So what is the deal with PDD?

So PDD for those that don't know stands for Post Disney Depression. 

Now people can experience a slight taste of this when they return home from their holidays after visiting a Disney park. However, nothing can compare or even come close to when you return home after a whole year being away in the magical place that is often referred to as the Happiest place on Earth.

I found the above photo when I searched the internet for PDD and it made me smile. As it's true you really do miss even the smallest of things that Disney has that isn't just the characters or the rides, yes believe it or not this can even include the bathrooms (or restrooms, or toilets depending on where you are from). Now of course I'm not saying I miss toilets, as that's just plain weird, I'm using this as an example as it just showcases how Disney pays attention to such detail. Even the most mundane and often seemingly dull parts of a normal day can become a little bit more magical thanks to Disney. It is this that I miss, living in a magical world so far removed from reality that you can immerse yourself and leave all your cares and worries behind and release your inner child and just have fun. I always knew saying goodbye to Disney would be the hardest it is a place that holds so many fond memories for me and is one of the reasons I was so keen to have the opportunity to become part of the magic in the first place. 

Whilst I miss Disney, although it may sound odd, I don't necessarily miss the job per sé, and by this I'm referring to the raw root of it, being a merchandise hostess. I had reached a point with it where I had become comfortable within the role as I knew what I was doing and I feel I had taken everything I could possibly learn away from the job. I was ready for a new challenge.

However, although I don't miss the role itself, I do miss working for Disney and the surrounding aspects of the job role. Working for Disney was such an honour. Never before have I had the opportunity to work for an organisation that's main focus is to make other people happy and go above and beyond for a guest (I find it hard to say Customer now as Disney language has become my own now so excuse this!). I got to be a part of creating magic for guests and even if at times I didn't feel I was doing anything extraordinary guests had a wonderful way to let you know how you had helped make their vacation a special one as exampled below. 

The best thing for me is when you had a guest come up to you and say "I remember you, I just want to say thank you..." I particularly remember this one guest who I apparently helped back in September of last year and she returned around April time, (which was a particularly rough time for me then) and said "I'm not sure if you remember me but I just want to say thank you for last time when you offered a kind hand to my Dad who was suffering with Parkinson's, you let him take shelter in your store away from the heat and a step to rest on whilst engaging in a lovely conversation with him. You never forget a kind gesture like that." I remember having to take a few moments to head backstage (by this I mean the stockroom/away from view of guests) to have a little cry. As little did I know back then what a difference I had made to that person's day, but for her to remember me too and to make sure to come find me was all very overwhelming. It struck a personal chord to with me as my own Papa back home equally suffers with Parkinson's and I know all too well what that is like to cope with on a day to day basis. This lovely lady reminded me why I was there and helped me to regain my focus and made me realise even if some days I didn't feel I was being particularly magical, sometimes just being kind and being yourself is enough. 

Furthermore, I miss the people. The people you work with are just second to none. The leaders out there, the coordinators and just generally every cast member you meet. Obviously on a personal level I miss those that I would work with on more of a daily basis, whilst we didn't always see eye to eye on things, overall we all shared the same goal of being a part of the Disney magic and sharing this with others to enjoy. I could spend hours listening to people's stories about Disney, why they chose to work there, where they have worked previously and the stories they have from this. Everyone's journey is unique and special and it was fun to discover them.

One aspect of PDD which makes it hard to cope with is social media, I of course have friends who I know are still out there living the dream and seeing their updates can be hard to see at times particularly on those days when you're feeling sad and wish you were there with them joining in on the fun. But whenever I feel sad like this I try to turn this around and instead be reminded how lucky I was that, that too was my life for a bit. I had that opportunity whereas some have not.  Although it is hard as I might see something someone did that I didn't get round to doing or wish I had done but this is just reason to head back. I try to think well thank goodness I didn't do absolutely everything as it gives me even more reason to head back and do all those things. I did all I wanted and could do with the time I had and circumstances I found myself in. It can be hard at times to think this way but I know I must in order to move on and get through PDD.

Fortunately though, I am blessed to still be in contact with friends I made out there, some who are still over in Disney and others who are now back home in the UK and countries such as France, Canada, Germany, the US and Mexico too! This program is great that you get to meet people from all over the place as it now means we can have new adventures when visiting one another in our 'home lands' how exciting?!

So PDD is an ongoing thing which I am slowly learning to deal with but it's great that I know I can always message one of my Disney friends who no doubt knows exactly what I am going through and feeling and can offer advice and support. 

And as Ellie from UP once said, I thank Disney for the adventure and now it's time for me to have a new one :).

An open letter about my magical year.

Dear all,

I can't tell you how annoyed I am to return to this blog and see it not completed. I honestly was just always so busy and never made the time to sit down and blog. Whilst I regret this a lot, nothing can be done now and there are a wealth of other bloggers out there who do a far better job than me anyway - so find those and read them!

Before going on this program and starting my year of adventure and fun I was full of hope and optimism and although a little apprehensive about what lay ahead I generally was beyond excited (I mean hellooo I was going to work for the big cheese himself - Mickey Mouse!). Having also just graduated in the summer of 2014 I had begun my first real 'adult job' in the big wide world but would often sit at my desk and dream and wonder what it would be like to just pack everything up, purchase a one way ticket and leave. It was daunting of course but I somehow knew I was ready, or so I thought.


I titled this blog 'Rachael's Magical Disney Year' because I thought it would be just that, one complete magical journey from start to finish but let's be real this is still life and life is full of ups and downs. Now don't get me wrong this isn't going to be a post about how it wasn't because overall I feel I can still say with confidence it was a magical year but in a different way to what I thought it would be.

Let's start from the beginning for those who haven't followed my journey from then. With the technical era that we are now in I was blessed to have the social media support of Facebook which allowed me to connect and communicate to all those participants going through this process. Once I had been given a date and confirmation of employment on November 25th 2014, I was able to then network and discover other people who shared my start date July 21st. Like most people we then set up our own private Facebook group where we could share our concerns, thoughts and excitement for the year ahead. We even managed to organise the majority of us to book onto the same flight out there which was of great comfort knowing I wouldn't be flying solo there, as let's be real a 9 hour long flight by yourself would be dull!

I accidentally did the quickest goodbye to my family at the airport which took us all by surprise I think, but I'm glad it was quick as it meant no one had time to have a big cry and get too emotional. Then off I went to meet the other July 21st start date people and away we went. 

The very start of the program is a whirlwind of emotions and fun as you begin to adjust to living in a foreign land, living with people from a variety of countries and getting used to the fact that you not only work for Disney but you get to LIVE there and visit for free...whaaaat?!?! That's a lot to take in.

As hinted my year was full of ups and downs but I won't go into all the details as not only will it probably put you all to sleep and you probably don't even care but this post is already long enough haha.

What I will say is though, the changing nature of the program with regards to people leaving and arriving is super tough. You honestly do begin to form a kind of family out there as you are all in the same boat being away from home it's only natural you begin to form tight bonds with people. What is even more difficult is when you find those people you click with and then their program ends months before yours does. I had this happen and struggled quite a bit, I honestly felt like I had said goodbye to members of my family. However, thanks to some good eggs, I got through it and towards the very end of my program I found some wonderful friends over in the Canada Pavilion who really helped turn my program around and helped make my last couple of months the best it could be. 

Main things I learnt from the program:

1) Sometimes you just have to be selfish and put yourself first
This was THE hardest lesson for me to learn out there. As being a naturally quiet person I can all to easily take a step back and let others go before me. 

I soon learnt that I needed to be more assertive and if I wanted to leave early on a particular day or I wanted to start my day on a particular register/till or I needed X day off for whatever reason I should just go for it. As if I didn't you'd soon find out someone else did without asking or thinking of others. This may seem petty but these little things really get to you out there.

2) You're here for a good time, not a long time.

This is of course just true to life in general. But a very good friend of mine would remind me of this whenever I needed a boost if I was feeling particularly glum. (and for anyone interested this is also an awesome song sung by - Trooper. Who knew? Okay probs the whole world did but shhh).

Unfortunately though, I was rudely reminded of this a fair few times in my year and by this I am referring to the unbelievable tragic life events that occurred. I won't go into detail of each as I still struggle with them to this day. The attack on Paris back in November of 2015 was the first real reminder that we aren't all here for a long time. Working so closely alongside the French cast members out there and living with my French roommate really brought this home. Not to forget the devastating week for Orlando in June, I honestly thought at one point it would never stop. Being so close as to 5 minutes away of the fatal shooting that night in the nightclub was a real wake up call for me.

Finally, just as I was finishing off my travels over in Canada I got the devastating news that one of my friends I had made during the program had passed away. When someone so kind, so loving, is taken from this Earth too soon this is something I can never truly come to terms with. I just know heaven has gained an all mighty angel and when it comes to my time to leave this place I hope we can meet again in heaven.

I know all too often I will be reminded of this. But I shall use it as a constant reminder to make the most of life, to not stay in a place that makes me unhappy or be with people who bring me down. It's not worth it, life is too precious to be anything but happy.

3) Everything happens for a reason 
This is oh so true. When I found out I didn't get the opportunity to be a trainer for Disney, I'm not going to lie to you I was pretty devastated as having seen so many go before me have this opportunity I felt it was something I needed personally to challenge myself and prove that I was capable of doing more. I wanted it not only for my career growth but personally I needed it at that time for confidence. 

However, instead of putting my head down I also had the upcoming role of being a Tea Tour Guide ahead of me. So I channelled all my energy into this instead and I like to think I did a good job too. I found confidence I didn't know I had and proved to myself if I really want to push myself out of my comfort zone I can do it and I'll survive. This then restored faith in myself and encouraged me to book a solo trip to California for a week. If you would have told me at the start of this program I would be booking and organising travel solo I would have laughed so hard and say I think you've got the wrong person. But it just goes to show we are far more capable then we ever give ourselves credit for.

4) When one door closes another one opens.

Having hinted at already in this post, when some of my very good friends finished their programs around February/March time I really hit an all time low when they left. I had become so used to them being with me that I really noticed their absence and I felt like everything was going wrong around me. I found it hard to enjoy Disney as Disney is meant to be enjoyed with friends not solo. However, I had a couple of amazing people who really took me under their wing and a leader who noticed and understood how I was feeling. These people really helped me persevere through and stick it out and I'm so grateful to them as I then found some of my best friends over in a whole different pavilion who helped me find my spark again and fall back in love with my Disney life. 

Now I'm aware this is all very first world problems and lets be real my life was pretty peachy, but unless you have done and experienced this program it's very hard to explain and help you understand what it feels like.

5) Life goes on...
Ultimately, life does go on. As with everything in life you need some down moments to enjoy the highs and everything has a weird way of working out alright in the end - trust me! 

I'm sure this blog post is pretty boring to most of you reading, but I will be posting a few more blog posts soon as I find this a really helpful way to get to grips with PDD (Post Disney Depression). I find writing my thoughts down a great way to gets things off my chest and out in the open. So if you don't mind reading my rambles then please continue to join me with this blog. 


Peace Out.

- Rachael x